Regifting Advice for the Holidays on the Today Show

This morning I joined Hoda and Kathie Lee on the Today Show to talk about the etiquette of regifting at the holidays.

I'm of two minds on this one--on the one hand, I get it. We're busy, we don't want to be wasteful, we need to economize. Besides, no one will ever know. You hope.

That's where my hesitation comes in--is it worth damaging a relationship with someone to save a little time or money on a gift? And even if you pull it off, it was inherently deceitful, which goes against one of the basic principles of etiquette--honesty.

Personally, I avoid this on a whole. I might regift a bottle of wine (as you can see in the segment, linked above), but that's about it. If you have something extra, or something you can't use, give it (unwrapped) to a friend who might enjoy it, "Sara, I have an extra copy of this book--would you like it?"

If you are going to regift--because sometimes the situation is too perfect not to-- be sure to follow these guidelines:

1. Only regift an item to someone if you truly think they would enjoy it. In other words, don't dump it on them just to get rid of it.

2. Only give items that are new and in their original packaging--nothing unique or handmade.

3. Never regift if you think it might upset either the person who gave the item to you, or the person to whom you are giving, should they find out.

What do you think? Is regifting okay? Have you done it? Do you think you've ever received a "regift"?

(And I can't sign off without telling you how cool it was to see Sigourney Weaver and Bette Midler, who were on the Today Show right before me! These ladies are as gorgeous and poised off camera as they are on.)

Comments

[Be Nice Creator]

As the youngest child I was raised with hand-me-downs, so I think that gave me a different perspective on second-hand items. For me, an old, warped donut cutter from the 80s makes me as happy as a brand new removable harddrive. Of course, second-hand things are not the same as regifting.

I agree that one should not regift anything that was handmade or one-of-a-kind and that one should always consider the person's enjoyment of the gift.

I would add that ultimately it comes down to the essential basis of gift-giving: is the (re-)gift something thoughtful and well-considered? Is the gift something you know someone would really enjoy more than you would (for example, you have two of them)? I would rather a gift that I gave be enjoyed by recipient number two, than to be lost in a pile somewhere by recipient number one. As the one who gives gifts, it is ultimately the thought that counts. If the person who receives the gift is touched by the thought behind it, isn't that the most important part? Perhaps this idea will make regifting a little easier to handle if you are the gifter or the giftee.