What Would Emily Post Do?

Fly the WiFi-Friendly Skies

 by Anna Post

I'm on the web all the time, whether it's for work or my own personal use. I'm also on planes all the time, though just for work. The two don't usually mix, but thanks to AirTran, that will soon be changing. 

By the end of July, AirTran plans to have all of its planes equipped to offer in-flight WiFi to passengers with wireless internet-capable devices. No more disconnecting from the real world from take-off to touch-down.

So much of my life is wired into the internet--blogging, banking, email, weather, news, pop culture, Facebook, Netflix, Pandora, work, shopping--that I always thought I'd be happy to log back on once we reached cruising altitude. I'm a very copacetic flyer, enjoying the time-out from phone calls and emails to read books and magazines, get ahead on my columns and chapters for work, watch in-flight movies, or snooze to my iPod. I'm realizing that I indulge--and enjoy--all of these things because I don't have the internet as an option. Will that enjoyment diminish now that it's available? I don't think so. Hello, Netflix on-demand!

It does, however, make me think about how best to set some boundaries. Perhaps I won't open Outlook. And in such crowded quarters, it certainly makes me think about privacy. Someone reading my laptop over my shoulder right now will likely see my latest masterpiece of etiquette--hardly state secrets. But I check my bank account several times a day. Not information I want available to seat 14B. And many of the movies in my Netflix queue are rated R; while many are also Oscar nominated, it doesn't mean they are appropriate for a public audience.

It's for exactly these kinds of reasons that I'm working with 3M Privacy Filters on an etiquette program. A thin film of plastic, the 3M privacy filter drops into discrete clear plastic tabs that adhere to the edges of your screen, making the filter removable when at home. From the side, the screen appears black, but when sitting in front of it, you'd never know it was there.

I recently saw them in use when visiting someone in the hospital, and they make perfect sense--nothing on the monitor was visible, even as I passed very close to a mobile computer unit. Unless the passenger directly behind you has x-ray vision, your bank codes and taste in movies will stay as private as you could wish. (Read: no one has to know that I watch Gossip Girl.)

Interestingly, 3M also makes a film that works the same way as the computer filters, but is used for cell phones. But please, let's draw the line at in-flight cell phone use. We need to keep those skies friendly.

Gibbs Delivers White House Press Briefing on Etiquette

by Anna Post

At a White House briefing yesterday, Press Secretary Robert Gibbs was speaking to members of the press when a cell phone rang. He handled it perfectly, asking the owner, John Gizzi of Human Events magazine, to put it on vibrate. His tone used humor to stem Gizzi's rudeness—especially as it was the third time he'd asked it to be shut off. I know some corporate cultures are lax in their attitudes toward cell phones and BlackBerries, but this is, um, the White House. And televised. Show a little respect!

Figuring the third time was the charm, Gibbs returned to his briefing, only to have the phone ring a fourth time. Not only was Gizzi thoughtlessly rude to have left it on so many times, he was actively rude to ignore the request to switch it off.

Gibbs then did what so many of us have dreamed of in restaurants, movie theaters, and crowded airports: He confiscated the phone and tossed it down an adjacent hallway (claiming someone caught it), and then literally shut the door on the while thing. It made my day watching how well he handled it.

But it gets better. Another phone goes off, and instead of ignoring it, the phone's owner, CBS reporter Bill Plante, actually takes the call! He blew it twice: He should have had the phone on vibrate—especially after Gibbs made his nationally televised point—and if he was going to take the call, he should have left the room first and then answered. Perhaps it was a play to get some face time and attention for CBS? If so, I can only say that in this case, not all press is good press. 

The White House press corps clearly needs an etiquette briefing: Keep phones on silent or vibrate when in a meeting, or better yet, turn them off. That's what voice mail, annoying as it is, is for. If you simply must take a call, step outside first and then answer.

I can already hear the follow up: Why? Attention is a sign of respect. When you've chosen to commit your time to someone, whether it's in business or your personal life, you owe them your attention—you owe them your respect.

NPR Shows Us How to Shake the Swine Flu

From swine flu scares to the common cold, facts are facts: Germs are spread by human contact. But for as long as humans have understood the concept of being social, greetings have been part of our code of civility. Whether it's bowing, kissing, or shaking hands, failing to engage in these greetings can damage first impressions or long-standing relationships alike.

So what happens when safeguarding our collective health comes into conflict with the most basic and ingrained of social customs? NPR inspired me today with their partly serious, partly spoof guide, Don't Gimme Five! While I'd draw the line at the "foot smack" (it looks too much like a ball player kicking sand at an umpire), holding back on the classic shake isn't always a bad idea.

Whether you refrain from contact to help the CDC, because your religion forbids it, or your hand just isn't available, say with words what the hand shake, hug, or social kiss implicitly conveys, "It's great to meet you/see you; please excuse me for not shaking hands."